Christian Nutjobs That Worship Snakes
2009 October 21
They shall take up serpents; and if they drink any deadly thing, it shall not hurt them; they shall lay hands on the sick, and they shall recover. ~ Mark 16:18
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* Why would Jesus promise to protect his disciples against serpents, but gave no promise to protect against other harmful animals?
* Why would these “snake handling” nutjobs flirt with death? Does it give them some extra “edge” in life, besides stupidity?
* How can these types of Christians point fingers at Jehovah’s Witnesses and Mormons and claim they are wrong? This is the ultimate in “nutiness”.
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Snake handlers are weird, no doubt about it. Are they still Christian, or have they actually built a religion around their legless idols but still try to claim Christian roots because of one line in one gospel?
To me these guys are no more nutty then any of the more extreme versions of religion. What I don’t get is why other christians that claim the bible is literal don’t prove they are christians this way.
It goes for the sorry state of Nigeria, too. Missionaries provided bibles and taught them it was literal and since they already had superstitions about magic and witchcraft in their society, it was pretty easy to jump to the bits of the bible permitting the killing of witches. Bad enough concept, but they’re killing kids with this loonyass interpretation of the Word. It’s horrible.
Nigeria is being torn apart. Mostly Catholics in the south and Muslims in the North. Its surprising the country hasn’t imploded.
Hehehe, they handle “snakes” in church.
They’re nuts. They believe a snake talked to Eve. Holding snakes isn’t really any nuttier than that.
Trouser snakes? Hmmm…
Yeah One-Eyed Trouser Snakes!!
These people are undoubtedly insane. They are like drug addicts the way they act. This is proof that religion warps the mind to believe in anything no matter how insane or dangerous it is. No matter how much you believe that God will protect you, if you get bitten by a poisonous snake, it can kill you. If God protected people against venomous snake bites, anti-venom wouldn’t need to exist. Don’t they realize that Mark 16:18 says “and if they drink any deadly thing, it shall not hurt them”? They would have to drink something poisonous for it to not hurt them. So getting bitten would still hurt them like anybody else. I swear, if the Bible said hitting yourself in the head with a hammer will bring you closer to God, there would be churches that would do such a thing and people would believe it.
Snakes and religious leaders, what’s the difference?
now if they drank a glass containing cyanide that would be a shocker, less a chance of them being killed if they handled snakes, and no evidence of anyone being healed by someone touching them lol
I don’t know about you guys but this just fucking pisses me off. I am so irritated with stupid, goddamn lame ass religous beliefs. It is amazing to me how people can be convinced to blow themselves up, put poisonous snakes to there face, drink poison cool aid, just believe and pray and give money and god will put money in your bank account. I am totally fed up with any religion or religous beliefs. If I ever win something and get on T.V., I am going to thank “Satan”, just to prove a point. I am on tilt right know, sorry for all the negativity, most of my family are bible thumpin, tongue speakin christians and I am just fead up with there stupid facebook posts, where all they do is bash Obama and put up jesus shit. I feel better now, Thanks for letting me post Mark! I fell a bit better
Many of us are fed up with American Christianity in general.
Just posted the video to my facebook, and I can’t wait for some family lashing, should be fun.
A while ago I read about one of these loons getting bitten, refusing medical care and dropping dead, thus proving Mark 16:18 to be bollocks. What did not occur to me at the time was the enormous kudos that this guy would have gained had he recovered. He would have had enormous crowds of gullible idiots in the palm of his hand, every one of them totally eager to hand over sack loads of their hard earned money. To die for? Well maybe.
Of course the guy who dies was either living in sin, or he wasn’t as faithful as he should have been. therefore he just serves as a hard lesson to the rest of the flock. Just the kind of sensationalism that has gotten religious idiots this far.
Drinking strychnine? In low doses, it acts more or less like a stimulant. The nut in the video claims children aren’t allowed to handle the snakes; the reason being, after many children died in these Pentecostal churches, many states passed laws. These ignorant people claimed the laws violated their religious speech, and freedoms. This all happened after a film crew, while making a documentary, filmed a child as she was being bitten; the girl died. This teenage girl had been “sinning,” according to her mother. As the girl was standing there next to the box with the snakes in it; and as folks where touching her, and praying for her, the pastor said, “reach in there, and get you a snake girl.” As the girl was choosing a snake, the pastor said, “NO NO NO, get you a big one girl, that ones to small.” As she crabbed this big pit-viper looking thing; it bit her in the face, and she then died.
These people are just snake-shit crazy!
That was the most retarded thing I’ve seen in ages. WTF????
That’s like saying, “I have a great immune system, so I’ll go lick some plague victims.” If they really think they’re protected, why push it? Idiots…
That statement made me spit out my coffee all over my desk.
Of course, taking up snakes isn’t enough for some. I like the hardcorps people who take up buckets of stricnine! I don’t think THAT one’s in the Bible. I don’t think the Bible said “They shall tire of the thrill of taking up serpents, so they shall migrate to little plastic beakers of stricnine. They shalt drink of thine beakers until their bellies cry out in pain…” but what the hell! They’ve come this far!…
The weird thing is, many non-snake-handling Christians agree with us atheists that the snake-handlers are at least a little nuts. Yet, they accept the snakies as being part of God’s big, happy, wonderful, faithful family. What none of them seem to get is, since there is no standard method used by all believers to interpret holy texts, pretty much anything goes and can be justified using the same text. This, to me, is a serious weakness and was one of the things that caused me to walk away from it. I eventually realized that I was making up shit and figured out that everyone else was making up shit too and that there was no way to tell whose shit was better. So, I decided to stop playing with all the shit and move on with my life. Best decision I ever made.